Settling...

Everyone had left for the day. I sat in my office and went through paperwork, cleared out old messages, and added items to my to-do list. Eventually, I noticed that it was completely quiet; my playlist had come to an end. I glanced up to see what time it was as it is often hard to gauge the time from my vantage point. Beige upon beige, muted grays, varying shades of brown, and  muddy blues are the prevalent color scheme. The fluorescent lights cast an artificial glow. And it can all feel artificial at times. Lifeless. It can feel as if there is this impenetrable shell we have constructed to protect us, even from God himself. And we go through the motions never stopping to see, never realizing that we are made to reach out. To reach out beyond ourselves and the lives that we have made so very small by filling them with such big things that are ultimately meaningless.

And God isn't the one with the drab palette. But, we have settled for it all too often. I breathe deep, move my chair aside, and push open the dingy, off-white blinds that keep the sun out. I am caught off guard by a brilliant blue sky {our summer skies are usually smog-filled} and lush green trees that sway in the gentle wind. And all I want is His rushing wind. All I want is to surrender those places where I've kept the Son out. I want more of Jesus. That is all.