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Showing posts from February, 2014

Mi Corazón

I said I wanted to write more this year. I have said a lot of things in my life. And when the feeling isn't there, it is hard for this feel-y girl to fake it. It is hard to pretend. Pretending isn't authentic to me.

And it felt scary to not be drawn in, to not really seek Him out. It felt uncomfortable to be in a valley and not even look for a path leading somewhere else. Anywhere else.

It was more like a, "I don't feel you, and I suck at faking it and pretending, but I'll try, and I hope you will meet me there. Wherever 'there' may be." And so it went. And I was numb. So numb.

Numb from being treated abominably by so-called Christians. Numb from lack of community, and just really tired of trying to find something different. Anything.

Then, on Saturday morning, there was an unexpected knock at my door. I opened the door to find two women with their Bibles and pamphlets. The older woman greeted me in Spanish. I, mostly from habit, responded in my poor…