Roads Part 2

Okay, so the more complicated part always has to do with the relationships. Looking through my Bible tonight, I found many verses on the topic of friendship from the importance of friendship (iron sharpens iron, a friend to pick you up when you fall, and to receive wise council from) to warnings about imprudent friendships (don't make friends with an angry man lest you follow his ways) and everything in between. 


I view relationships as a gift. It would be harder to walk through this journey without friendship, especially the dark, shadowy valley places. Yet, these too are always changing. And it is hard. I have lived enough years to see it. People move, people change jobs, change churches - people just change. People you would never fathom being without slowly drift away until they are just a friend on Facebook whom you wish a happy birthday to, or possibly comment on big life events. There wasn't a falling out, and you remember your friendship fondly, but they aren't a part of your life any longer. And that change can be hard to wrap your heart around. 


There are the rare "lifers", though. The friends who remain constant, even if there is a lull in communication, even if thousands of miles separate you. I am truly thankful for these special bonds. I left my last church in March of 2011 and I changed jobs in July of 2011. I have felt the drifting. I have felt the loneliness that accompanies it. Somehow it is difficult to not take it all personally (like I am not worth it or something). And I am reminded not to hold onto anything or anyone too tightly because sometimes even those we expect to be with us for the long haul, aren't. Spouses leave, children grow up, family members sever ties, people die...I have experienced all of these things...Loving is risky, but not loving is even riskier. I have always liked this quote by C.S. Lewis: “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

I am traveling down some new roads. And it can be daunting, this putting myself out there and being vulnerable. But, I know I have to, and so I am trying to care for the budding new relationships that are forming while also loving those who may or may not continue to drift away. And my desire, even though I fail often, is to always be kind and shine the light of Jesus to everyone I encounter. 


And it is worth it. No matter what, there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother....Jesus! Oh, what a friend, indeed.